Crack Fic Collection
by Coffeeandlicorice
Summary: Mostly NorIce. I might upload from time to time, but don't expect updates that much.
1. But Why Bae

**Drabble 1- But Why Bae**

* * *

Norway glanced over at Hong Kong for what seemed to be the millionth time that day. But he couldn't help that the brown, choppy haired boy was right across from him, and every time that he reached for his coffee mug, he looked up and his eyes lingered for a second too long. He cleared his throat, surprising Hong Kong.

"So... Do you need anything to eat or drink?" _Smooth move, Nor._ he mentally face palmed.

"Some water would be fine, thanks." Leon replied in a smooth, mellow voice and a small nod. Norway nodded and got up, putting his book down and going into the kitchen, getting a glass of water and walked back to the living room, handing the glass to him. Their fingers brushed each other, and he could feel the small shock. Hong Kong didn't give any signs that he had felt this too, sipping on the water calmly. And awkward silence filled the room, which Norway soon broke.

"Hey, I like my bed but I would love to be in yours." He gulped, watching the stunned nation's expression.

He couldn't help a tiny smirk and continued on.

"I'll be Burger King and you'll be McDonald's, I'll be having it my way and you'll be loving it." He said in a low, flirty tone.

Hong Kong's eyes only widened more, and before Norway could shoot out another one, Iceland finished up getting dressed in his room and came downstairs. Hong Kong quickly switched his attention to Iceland, a bit too quickly.

Norway frowned. Hong Kong was practically drooling over the sight of Iceland just being in the same room. Iceland, glanced at Norway, and then fixed his eyes on Hong Kong.

"Sorry, did I make you wait long?" Iceland asked, dressed in a white button up, and brown trousers, his usual outfit. "Bird," He was referring to Mr Puffin, "was bothering me. Could barely get dressed."

"No it's alright!" Hong Kong shot back, his eyes twinkling. Norway's frown deepened. He abruptly stood up.

"Lillebror, Hong Kong is my bae. I am his bae. Please respect that." he informed in a tone of the utmost seriousness. He wrapped his arms around Hong Kong's waist, observing both boy's horrified expression. He could feel Hong Kong tense up in his grip, his smirk growing a bit wider.

"But... But I want you to be my bae!" Iceland whined. The tables turned, Norway's eyes as wide as saucers. Hong Kong finally wiggled out of his grip. "I am not your bae. Iceland is my bae." He looked over to Iceland, who was shellshocked.

Hong Kong stood up, grabbing Iceland's hand and dragged him out the door.

"HASHTAG THIS COULD BE US BUT YOU WANT HONG KONG!" Iceland desperately shouted.

"BUT BAE WHY?!" Norway screamed back.

Hong Kong turned around and opened his mouth.

"I CAME OUT HERE TO HAVE A GOOD TIME AND I AM HONESTLY FEELING SO ATTACKED RIGHT NOW." The pair, with a wailing Iceland and a grumbling Hong Kong, stormed out of sight.

Norway pursed his lip. "But..." he voice cracked. "Bae, Why?"

* * *

**OMG I DONT KNOW REVIEW PLEASE I WONT BE UPDATING THIS ONE AS OFTEN AS MY OTHER STORIES AND WILL ONLY UPLOAD ONCE I HAVE SOME IDEA OKAY BYE IM NOT SORRY**


	2. INDEPENDENCE DAY

**Chapter 2- INDEPENDENCE DAY**

* * *

"Has anyone seen Iceland?" Norway asked, holding a small cake and the Icelandic flag. Finland whipped his head around with a horrified expression, wide eyes and trembling.

_"NO." _He shivered and turned around, shaking a bit. Norway raised an eyebrow, heading towards Iceland's room. He heard some music thumping from his room, and he opened the door, only to be stopped by Finland.

"Enter if you want to go deaf." He said cryptically, and went back to whatever he was doing. Norway shrugged, swinging the door open, only to be assaulted by loud Sigur Ros music, and the sight of Denmark and Iceland dancing.

"YAY NORWAY'S HERE!" Iceland exclaimed, pulling him in and shutting the door. He grabbed the cake and the flag, setting them both on his desk. Music blasted through his computer speakers, so loud Norway could barely hear.

"I GOT ICEY *HIC* DRUNK!" Denmark exclaimed. Norway twitched, choking him by the tie.

"YOU DID WHAT?"

"LEMME GOOOOOOO!" Denmark wailed, gasping for air when he was released. Around Iceland's room were Icelandic flags, and banners.

"INDEPENDENCE! FREEEEEEDOM!" Iceland let out a battle cry and tackled Norway. The Icelandic teen grinned at Norway, whose heart quivered at the sight of Iceland's tiny bit sexy grin.

"You're acting like America, or Denmark." He retorted. Iceland raised an eyebrow, giggling a bit. Norway could feel his breath on his cheeks, and he could smell the alcohol.

"OH MY GOD, CARMELLDANSEN IS ON!" Denmark whooped loudly and shook his hips, to which Iceland laughed, and pulled Norway up, bumping hips with him. Then, his lamp got unplugged and Iceland started crying. He was sobbing and tearing.

"I-ICELAND?" Norway yelled. Denmark watched them.

"TEH LAMP WENT OUT AND NOW IT WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO LIGHT UP MY LIIIIIIFE!"

Norway facepalmed, going over and plugging in the lamp. Iceland squealed in pleasure and cheered.

"AWWW YEAHAHHAHAHAH!" Denmark yelled. Norway's ears were starting to hurt, so he pulled Iceland and the cake outside.

"WE TIME TRAVELLED OH MY GODS." Iceland exclaimed, still screaming. "OOOOOH CAKE FROM THE PAAAAST."

Then they ate the cake and Denmark passed out, the end.

* * *

**Author's Notes~**

**Idk. Review please. Liek thanks totally~**


	3. iDek

Norway strutted into Iceland's room, flopping ungracefully on his bed and making the duvet floof up around groaned, staring at Norway.

"What do you want?" The irritated boy asked.

"I need to put my THUNDA STICK IN YOUR BA JUNKA JUNK." Norway said, moving his head into Iceland's lap. "BOI WHY YA SO SQUISHY?!"

This earned a blush from Iceland.

"K-K-KAWAII!"

"SHUT UP NOR!" He retreated his legs making Norway pout.

"SUGOOOIII" Norway exclaimed, pinching Iceland's flushed cheeks.

"Adorable Icey is Adorable."

"I AM NOT."

"MUCH KAWAII. SO SUGOII. WOW. ICELAND."

"STOP-"

"NOTICE ME KOUHAI"

"WHAT DOES THAT EVEN-"

"IT MEANS YOU'RE ADORABLE"

"I AM NOT-"

"YOU HAVE A CUTE BUTT"

"G-GET OUT"

And then Norway left the room, smirking.

* * *

**Author Notes**

**my story Drabble thing unedited. XD UNEDITED MEANS MISTAKES SORRY PLUS I WROTE THIS ON A PLANE **


	4. ANACONDA

Emil shoved in Lukas with his _**DIDDLY DOINK**_. "**_HARDER!_**!" Lukas yelled as his _**DISCO STICK**_ was pumped by Emil. "my _**anACONDA**_ DONT" Emil screeched as he broke into the chorus of _**ANACONDA**_. And then denmark walked in.

The end.

* * *

**A/N:**

**I can't believe someone followed this.**


	5. BAKA!

sWeden walked into the room in a schoolgirl uniform but saw finland eating cookies without him.

"Su-San, this isn't wat it looks like!" He said with dramatic spa rkle tear in eyes.

"fiNLAND YOU BAKA!" Swedork exclaimed as he ran away with dramatic sparkly tears and STILL in a school girl uniform. And then norway and iceland came and made out and cuddled and ate cookies.

the end.

* * *

**A/N:**

**reply to SOMEONE: **

**wHAT IF I TOLD YOU I JACKED OFF TO THIS**

**WAT FOR YUR OWN SAKE I HOP YOY DONT**


End file.
